Erased

I remember waking up feeling depressed this morning. My pillow had a damp scent to it, dappled by the sorrows of a forgotten dream. Last night’s mascara had smudged onto the sheets and my makeup bled, just like my heart did.
Something, somewhere, had quietly fallen apart.
There was a sour taste in my mouth too. A lingering taste of something old and forgotten. Broken bits of sunlight entered my room, putting the shattered picture frame on the mantlepiece, under the glare of the spotlight.
I remember how my grandmother would stitch my toys back together and fix my entire world. Or how a little glue at the edges would make everything perfect again. I wish I was the same. But if they tried to sew me with a needle, all I would get is scars. And you have given me enough of that already.
I remember watching these movies with heroes wearing armour to battle and yet Achilles died only for love. He wore the armour wrong, I guess. He should’ve strapped it around his heart.
I don’t remember a word you said, or the excuses that you were fishing for. I just remember the suffocation, the disgust, the rejection. The last bit is what killed me. And you used it like a dagger, round and round, winding into my soul.
My strings snapped the very instant that you broke our threads. Now I am neither tied to you, nor to the mundane implications of this life.
The journey back home was a jumble of colours. My life felt like a spoiled canvas. All the colours clawing, battling to breathe. The lights twinkling in the distance danced to a despicable tune. The horns blaring over, just blotches on this heartless city.
The monster underneath my bed curses me for loving someone even uglier than him.
Falling for you, was like falling down.

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